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  Kim and Ket Stay Alive...Maybe?
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A HORROR MOVIE COMEDY PODCAST

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What do you get ...

...when two best friends, and horror movie fans, convince themselves that they would definitely be ‘the final girl’ at the end of the movie and never be the girl 'running up the stairs when she should be running out the front door'? You get Kim and Ket Stay Alive… Maybe. Each episode, Kim Burns and Ketryn Porter choose a different horror movie, and through very scientific (not scientific), totally indisputable (very disputable) methods, and amidst hilarious tangents about their personal lives, they determine whether they would be the ones to #StayAlive at the end. ​
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Listen to Ep. 268
Ket tells Kim about the talked-about Shudder flick, Speak No Evil. Let us be clear: being polite will get you killed. So, do with that as you will. The girls have completed both of their wedding quests and are ready to take on October. They also occasionally know the correct words to “Country Roads” but not always, and are only mildly clear on their geography of the “Norwegiany” part of the world. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Speak No Evil.
Dir. Christian Tafdrup
Writers Christian Tafdrup, Mads Tafdrup
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Listen to Ep. 267
Kim tells Ket about her boy, M. Night’s film, Split, starring Ket’s boy, James McAvoy. Between the 12 million weddings the girls are attending, the girls find time to record a pod. We learn the only occupation fit for Clares, according to Ketryn. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Split.
Dir/Writer. M. Night Shyamalan
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Listen to Ep. 266
Ket tells Kim about The Mummy as the beginning of their journey into the classic Universal Monsters. If this movie is any indicator, two of those monsters are misogyny and racism. Ba-dum CHHHH! Both girls end up quite lost by the end. Just bumbling around the place like The Mummy (that’s only in the movie for 12 seconds). Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in The Mummy.
Dir. Karl Freund
Writers Nina Wilcox Putnam, Richard Schayer, John L. Balderston
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Listen to Ep. 265
Kim tells Ket about the movie that saved her life on a 37 million hour trek home from Brazil, Renfield, starring our boy, Ic Age, alongside ANOTHER favorite Nick of the pod! This one, of the Hoult variety. Also, don’t worry, the girls nailed down the names of Kim and D’s imaginary dogs. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Renfield.
Dir. Chris McKay
Writers Ryan Ridley, Robert Kirkman, Ava Tramer
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Listen to Ep. 264
Kim, Ket AND, most importantly, Arik were all down for the count, healthwise, this week. So the girls took another trip down memory lane and are bringing you a throwback all the way back to episode 25, where we learn who first threatened who with having them replaced with a Ghost Host... 
Ket tells Kim about Annihilation starring Natalie Portman, Oscar Isaac, Gina Rodriguez, Tessa Thompson and Jennifer Jason Leigh. Ket will educate Kim on what she’s been missing in terms of the hotness that is Oscar Isaac. They’ll both educate all of you on the Bechdel Test.  And THEY’LL be educated on tentacle blood and jurassic bear skull monsters. And all of YOU will educate Kim and Ket on where the quote “We’re all a little crazy” came from. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Annihilation. 
Dir. Alex Garland
Writer Alex Garland
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LISTEN TO EP. 263
Ket tells Kim about Don’t Knock Twice starring Katie Sackhoff, Lucy Boynton and a gorgeous UK manor. This is the episode we’ll all refer back to as the conception of Jerry the Demon’s new sitcom where he plays the Kramer-like neighbor to Baba Ghanoush. I mean Baba Yaga! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Don’t Knock Twice.
Dir. Caradog W. James
Writers Mark Huckerrby, Nick Ostler
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LISTEN TO EP. 262
While Kim is off galavanting Goddess know where, the girls thought that they would take you on a little trip down memory lane with their 64th episode. A classic, if they do say so themselves…
Kim tells Ket about the classic Night of the Living Dead starring Duane Jones and Judith O’Dea.  It’s spooky Halloween and what better way to celebrate than to kill some non-trademarked zombies? So give us an Eskiball Kiss, let’s put some doors on doors and slap some sense into Barbler. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Night of the Living Dead.
Dir. George Romero
Writer John Russo
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LISTEN TO EP. 261
Kim tells Ket about the Shudder original, The Seed. Ket learns that she is the amalgamation of all three characters and Kim’s annoyed at all of them. This alien movie feels really apropos seeing as the government just told us there are aliens and we all collectively gave about as many shits as these chicks. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in The Seed.
Dir. Sam Walker
Writer Sam Walker
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LISTEN TO EP. 260
Ket tells Kim about the Sci-Fi Horror from the not-so-distant future, Demon Seed. Let me tell you, it’s… CRAZY TOWN. We finally learn Kim’s full, legal first name. Many thought it was Kimberly but it’s actually Kimbert. And, have no fear, Ket did figure out how to relate this back to the Barbie movie many a time. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Demon Seed.
Dir. Donald Cammell
Writers Dean R. Koontz (novel), Robert Jaffe and Roger O. Hirson (screenplay)
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LISTEN TO EP. 259
Kim tells Ket about Night of the Demons! (From Dusk til Dawn of the Dead Bird(s)emic: Shock and Terror Night of the Demons.) It’s also week two of some dumbass kids gettin’ up to no good in some demon-y ass mansion. Ket is pretty ready for most of the characters to die almost instantly. But when all else fails, take a nap. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Night of the Demons.
Dir. Kevin Tenney
Writer Joe Augustyn
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LISTEN TO EP. 258
Ket tells Kim about the obscure, unreleased film starring The Skipper AKA Alan Hale Jr. This movie appears to be about an immortal 90 yr old 50 yr old man who is terrorizing the poor man’s Scooby Gang. Excitingly, the girls are still goin’: From Dusk Till Dawn the Dead Bird(s)emic: Shock and Terror Night! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Terror Night.
Dir. Nick Marino, Andre de Toth
Writers Kenneth J. Hall, Murray Levy, Nick Marino
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LISTEN TO EP. 257
Kim tells Ket about the absolutely surreal Birdemic: Shock and Terror. The girls are offering a trigger warning to all software salesmen who may find the success of Rod simply too much to take in such a volatile industry. Just remember, you’re worth more than your biggest sale. Also, if you’re waiting for birds… umm… keep waiting. So here we are: From Dusk Till Dawn of the Dead Bird(s)emic: Shock and Terror. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Birdemic: Shock and Terror.
Dir/Writer James Nguyen
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LISTEN TO EP. 256
Ket tells Kim about Dead Birds, suggested by Sammie, Michael, starring Henry Thomas, Michael Shannon and Patrick Fugit. The girls are still trying to keep this title train going. Let’s see how long it’ll last! Here’s what they do know, these guys do NOT know how to spot haunted stuff and honestly… they’re empathy can only go so far. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Dead Birds.
Dir. Alex Turner
Writer Simon Barrett
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LISTEN TO EP. 255
Ket tells GUY BUSICK about episode 6 of Guillermo del Toro's Netflix series. To accommodate for traveling, Guy steps into the hot seat and embarks on a journey with Jenkins Brown bonin’ down all about town. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Guy will live or die in Dreams in the Witch House.
Dir. Catherin Hardwicke
Writers H.P. Lovecraft, Mika Watkins, Guillermo  del Toro
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LISTEN TO EP. 254
Kim tells Ket about the 2004 remake of Dawn of the Dead starring Sarah Polley and Ving Rhames. We went from From Dusk Till DAWN to DAWN of the Dead! Let’s see how long they keep it going… or how long it takes for them to get bored or forget. Kim would also like to ask for a whiteboard for her birthday, please/thank you. So, call Dr. Collie! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Dawn of the Dead.
Dir. Zack Snyder
Writers George A. Romero, James Gunn
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LISTEN TO EP. 253
Ket tells Kim about the cult classic, From Dusk Till Dawn. So cover your feet, because Quentin’s in the house and he’s looking to exploit some toes and blow a doozy. Juliette Lewis, once again, proves herself to be the Queen of Range. And the 90s prove, once again, to be… problematic. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in From Dusk Till Dawn.
Dir. Robert Rodriguez
Writers Robert Kurtzman and Quentin Tarantino
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LISTEN TO EP. 252
Kim tells Ket about another Cronenberg classic, Scanners! The girls quickly realize that the best weapon is the humiliation that comes with shitting one’s pants. Kim introduces us to Baby Ruth’s nephew. And Ketryn finds a new job as a familiar. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Scanners.
Dir. David Cronenberg
​Writer David Cronenberg
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LISTEN TO EP. 251
Ket gives Kim the week off and plays a little “Shudder Roulette.” The wheel landed on the Shudder Exclusive, Offseason. Kim starts off by not being able to identify a VERY obvious needle drop during the credits. Unfortunately, the beachy flick was NOT the dose of vitamin D that Ketryn was hoping for, but they DO get a surprise visit from, friend of the pod, Jeremy Gardner! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in The Offseason. 
Dir. Mickey Keating
Writer Mickey Keating
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LISTEN TO EP. 250
Ket tells Kim about The Woman in Black starring Daniel Radcliffe in what appears to be just a movie that ChatGPT conjured up from the things most likely to be floating around Ketryn’s brain. The girls need you to know that you gotta share your village lore! I mean, unless you need the new guy for a sacrifice or something. So don’t go chasing waterfalls and let’s all take a little chloroform nap. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in The Woman in Black.
Dir. James Watckins
Writers Susan Hill Jane Goldman
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LISTEN TO EP. 249
Kim tells Ket about The Crazies starring Timothy Olyphant! The girls would first like to extend their heartfelt congratulations to Judy and David who are expecting their first BURRITO! Kim and Ket would also like to inform you of their upcoming legal battles. Ket is being sued by the estate of Johnny Cash. Kim is being sued by a car whose noise she imitated too convincingly. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in The Crazies.
Dir. Breck Eisner
Writers Scott Kosar, Ray Wright, George A. Romero
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Theme song is "Intimidate" by Arik Martin
Theme song is "Exhilarate" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
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